I found a quote a while back that hit home with me.
If you don’t heal what hurt you, you’ll bleed on people who didn’t cut you. - Unknown author
How true is that? How many times have you said something to someone when they didn’t deserve it? You reacted based on how someone treated you in the past.
How easy is it to feel that everyone will treat you bad or “the same way” as your last relationship?
It is easier to believe the bad that someone tells you about yourself than the good. And if you surround yourself with those negative people, it is hard to heal yourself from what has hurt you.
There are many steps in the healing process. Some of your hurts may be easy to heal, while others may take a lot of work and time. Each of us process our feeling different and we need to go at our own pace and find what works for us.
There is one step I’d like to discuss today, that step is letting go of toxic relationships. If you took an inventory of the top 4-5 people you spend the most time with and asked yourself “do they lift me up?” or “do they bring me down?” Would you say you spend more time with someone who lifts your spirit up or not?
It is hard for a flower to bloom in a dark room, some might but most flowers I know thrive with the sunshine. People are the same. We thrive when we are surrounded by positive light.
There have been times in my life where I have surrounded myself with people who bring me down. They focus on what they feel are your flaws instead of encouraging you. When you do something nice for them, they can only point out what you didn’t do or what they feel you didn’t do right. This can be a sign of a toxic relationship.
I am not saying this person is bad. They may be struggling with hurts from their past that have made them this way. And this person in your life may be someone you care for deeply. But we need to find a balance in our relationships that allow us to grow and heal.
If you find that you are in a toxic relationship, it may be time to spend less time or no time with this person. A toxic relationship can be a big roadblock in our healing process.
For me, I love being around other people who make me feel good and appreciate who I am. I feel I can be open and be myself, be authentic and genuine. It is wonderful when you feel pride in who you are and what you do.
You are a beautiful soul! I know this because you are a child of God. You are amazing and you have a wonderful purpose on this earth. Whether it is to be a good friend or a mother or a daughter or a wife. Maybe you are a teacher or a co-worker that can help make someone’s day brighter. We should all feel proud of who we are and what we have accomplished, no matter how big or small. Sometimes we let things or people in this world rob us of that.
I encourage you to find and spend time with those who lift you up, let go of all the toxic relationships that you can or at least cut back your time with them, and find your light to bloom. You are a beautiful flower on this earth, lift your face to the light and let it shine on your unique gifts to this world.
Sending peace, love, and joy to you my friend. Sam