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Updated: Mar 26, 2022

As I was working on a project for a friend, I emailed with the subject line - FOR APPROVAL. This got me thinking, how many times do we look to others for approval?

When I was married, I remember feeling alone. It is interesting that you can be in a home filled with people or a crowd and still feel alone. There were times throughout my marriage that I did not feel love… not only by my spouse, but also by my children.

Another thing, I didn’t feel appreciated or seen by those in my home. I didn’t feel appreciated or seen at work. I was looking towards others to show me appreciation, and I was not receiving it.

I’ve realized I was looking outside myself first for approval verses starting within. We have been taught to give to others, love others, encourage others, and to put others first. With this, we seek the same in return.

What happens when we do not receive that? We feel unworthy, we feel unimportant; we feel unloved, and we feel invisible. We look to other people to validate those feelings for us, and when it does not happen; we feel alone.

What if I told you you have the power to change that? Would you want to?

I have found how to do this in my life and I share this with my clients/friends that I partner with for coaching. The first step is always, let’s focus on looking inward.

As we grow, we are taught to do all for others, but what would happen if you did that for yourself? Loving yourself, acknowledging your worth, celebrating your accomplishments, loving who you are and spending one-on-one time filling your cup with inspiration to help you relax and appreciate all the good you have within!

This does sound easy, but it can be the hardest thing in the world for some people. This is a challenge for me. I know when I start my day with a devotional, journaling, quiet time for me, appreciation time for me and acknowledgment that I do love who I am, my days are much better. I feel empowered; I feel confident, and I have a beautiful joy and peace around me.

So… why do I struggle with keeping my self-care time sacred every single day? I am talking only 20 minutes… out of 1,440 minutes in a day… that is not a lot.

If you are like me, it’s ingrained in you that other people, things, and schedules are more important than self-care or ‘you’ time. To put myself first, I have to make a conscious effort daily. I make a conscious decision to let myself know I am not alone, I am worthy, I am important, I am loved, and it is okay to be seen.

I encourage you to do the same. I’ve had many conversations with God arguing my worth, but he assures me every time that I am his child, he loves me and he wants me to be the best me I can be and a light for him.

If you are having trouble finding this within you, reach out to me by DMing me or replying to me via email and let’s talk. You are worth 20 mins (or more) each day to acknowledge all your beauty within! Look inward for your approval not to others!

Sending you peace, love, and joy, my friend! Sam

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